Porpoise?

Today, on the phone, Beryl says:
"My nephew had a stuffed porpoise stuffed animal that he just loved."

Porpoise? As opposed to a dolphin? Could you really tell the difference?

Time flies

Beryl said to me today, "You know what they say, time flies when you're having a good time."

What? As opposed to time flies when you're having fun, I suppose. She claims that I have a different version of this adage because I'm younger. I disagree.

Peace

Beryl: (after I made some semi-rude comment) You don't want peace do you?
Me: No, I don't want a piece of you Beryl. Are you trying to intimidate me?
Beryl: No, PEACE, not piece. (walks out of the office)
Beverley: (laughing) Well, that does sound like something she'd say.

Chicken

No, Beryl isn't a chicken, but she sure loves eating it. She has told me on several occasions that if you use wine when cooking chicken that it opens it up and allows it to better absorb herbs and spices.
She made me taste her chicken when we ate lunch in the cafeteria today. I'm not a big meat eater, but I'll eat poultry from time to time, and I must say, it was pretty tasty.

Beryl on laundry

I had to do six load and that isn't even with my fall and winter clothes! I save on my cleaning bills because I'm allergic to wool.

Beryl on gambling

They do have nickel slots but they sure do eat up the nickels.

I'll beat you up!

Earlier this morning Beryl threatened to beat me with a cooked lasagna noodle, but just a few minutes ago she repeatedly whacked Amy with an envelope. Shocking, shocking.

*Sob*

Beryl has been gone since Wednesday at 2. Our little office is so quiet without her. :(

you people are so strange

Beryl frequently says to us, "You people are so strange." in an exasperated voice. SHE, however is the one who talks to herself. Half the time when she's talking to me I assume that it's a continuation of the long dialogues she has with herself and with her computer, and then get scolded for not paying attention.